would you trade it all?

after reading an honest and heartfelt blog post from one sweet blogger, i am inspired to talk about the various emotions many feel at one time or another  -- at least i do -- when attempting to dream big and make those dreams a reality.
how many people feel scared and unsure at times because they are not travelling the traditional, straight path? i often find myself on a rollercoaster of emotions because of all the twists and turns i've taken in my life. i go from being charged with energy, feeling like i can take on the world, confidently doing work i love, to hiding under the covers wondering what in the heck i'm doing. under the fuzzy green blanket i'm asking myself, who am i to think i can pull this off? what makes me feel worse is when others start questioning my path. thank goodness i don't have many of those people in my life.

taking a less travelled path and creating a career for yourself is not an easy choice. so many times in the last 10 years, i wished that i had known exactly what i wanted to do when i was younger, followed that path, and then be more settled now, more financially secure. but my good friend, cory, said to me once, "lynette, would you trade all of your experiences, travels, adventures, the person you've grown into today, just to be more stable and secure now?" of course my response was no! i like who i've become. thank goodness i am not the same person i was 10 years ago. i love the circle of people in my life. i love that when i'm a baba, i'll be able to talk about all the adventures i've had and all the learning i've done.

so, on those days when i start to feel shaky and unsure, first off, i accept that is exactly how i'm feeling at that moment instead of trying to push those emotions away. second, i try to stop fuelling the fire with negative thoughts. when you're feeling scared, insecure, unsure, or any other emotion, it's so easy to make up stories in your head and worry about things that are not even real. it is really easy to let your thoughts get out of control. finding something positive to say to yourself at these times helps to counter the negativity. i have started saying, "how human of me!" (thanks to judith hanson lasater.) and third, i think back to what my friend asked me, if i would be willing to trade how i've grown for the easier path. my answer is always no.

i think if we are willing to jump off of cliffs, to take chances on following our dreams, we have to be willing to accept the challenges and remember that they are worth it. i'm hoping so anyway.

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